MOVIE REVIEW
The Counselor (2013)
Kerry Brown/20th Century Fox
Some movies are made to stir the intellect and demonstrate what humans are truly capable of. Some movies are made to arouse the senses and explore every nuance of physical and emotional sensation. Some movies are made to astonish with colossal danger and showmanship, whether through real stunts or incredible virtual effects. And some movies are made to be watched by horny virgins who are stoned out of their gourds. “The Counselor” is most definitely the latter.
Not since “Blue Velvet” has Hollywood gone so high- and low-brow in a single movie. “The Counselor” looks great, has outstanding costume design and a real feel for the interior design tastes of midlevel drug dealers in Texas and Mexico. It has Cameron Diaz — with a perfect manicure and covered in cheetah tattoos — doing unspeakable things to her boyfriend’s Ferrari (more on which later). It also has Rosie Perez offering to give Michael Fassbender a blow job. THIS MOVIE HAS ROSIE PEREZ IN IT. And it is so bad it will undoubtedly become a classic like “Showgirls.”
Continue reading “White Powder on the Scales of Justice” »
Kerry Brown/20th Century Fox
Fan fiction can be fun, but even the good stuff usually crumbles when faced with the simple question "Why bother?" The urge to revisit the "Alien" universe and shine $130 million worth of 3-D clarity into one of its perfectly satisfying corners of ambiguity isn't inherently a bad idea, although anyone hoping for "Prometheus" to show the actual Space Jockey from the first film or how he ended up on LV-426 is going to be disappointed when none of that happens. Instead the film shoots for the moon, declaring from the off that his mysterious species is responsible for life on earth and has been beckoning us to the stars ever since; a plot whose stab at religiosity shares more DNA with "The X-Files" than anything else, right down to the mutating black oil that the Space Jockeys use to create their monsters. "Prometheus" is fan fiction writ very, very large.
Continue reading “Spaceballs” »
MOVIE REVIEW
Prometheus (2012)
Kerry Brown/20th Century Fox
Revisiting the “Alien” universe was always going to be a risk for Ridley Scott. “Alien” was the film that cemented his reputation as a visionary auteur and is rightly regarded as a classic, a sublime example of atmospheric horror. Three sequels of varying quality established a sprawling world, one that Mr. Scott had long hinted that he was interested in exploring further — his interest particularly piqued by the mysterious Space Jockey, whose fleeting glimpse in his original work posed questions that have never been answered. While “Prometheus” puts that quandary to bed, its ambitions and scale are far loftier than merely acting as a prequel to the series — which proves to be a refreshing yet frustrating approach.
Continue reading “In Space No One Will Hear the End of It” »
MOVIE REVIEW
Robin Hood (2010)
David Appleby/Universal Studios
You don’t need to see Ridley Scott’s “Robin Hood” to know exactly what you’d be in for if you did. For that, one need only look to the director’s “Gladiator” and “Kingdom of Heaven,” or, failing those, any swords-and-sandals Hollywood epic set in medieval England.
The charm and underdog attitude of the bandit of Sherwood Forest and his merry men have been scrubbed out, replaced by Russell Crowe’s intensely serious visage, a glum story about unjust taxation and expertly choreographed large-scale action scenes that are anathematic to the personality-driven legend.
Continue reading “Thickheaded as Thieves” »
MOVIE REVIEW
Tell Tale (2009)
Eric Lee/Tribeca Film Festival
The world premiere screening of Michael Cuesta’s “Tell Tale,” held Friday night as part of the Tribeca Film Festival, was interrupted with calls for EMS as a man slumped over in his seat, possibly fainting or suffering a seizure. Without making light of the occurrence or improbably speculating about it, it’s not inconceivable that Mr. Cuesta’s film could have such an intensely visceral effect on an audience member.
Continue reading “Total Eclipse of the Heart” »
MOVIE REVIEW
Body of Lies (2008)
François Duhamel/Warner Bros. Pictures
There’s an interesting movie hidden deep beneath the location-hopping techno-thriller surface of “Body of Lies.” It features a CIA agent working in Jordan and his romance with a local nurse. The ramifications of such a cross-cultural relationship – the suspicions directed toward them by her families and friends and his co-workers – and the ways in which the post-9/11 milieu affects the film could make for interesting, provocative viewing.
Continue reading “Bore on Terrorism” »
